“5am Parents Club a club for anybody that is woken up between 4.45-6.00 by the children wherever you are in the world”
On becoming a parent I was warned it would be life changing “Tony you will never get a minutes peace”. To say I wasn’t prepared for being woken at 5am or earlier 75% of the time is an understatement.
It’s so bloody early Breakfast News on BBC has not started . I remember the good old days of getting in at 5am after a kebab or pizza and a night of drink and dancing the night away. Instead I’m waking up to a baby gremlin shouting and shaking her cot Butter wouldn’t melt but minutes before it was like a zoo the noise she makes to get me up.
You wake looking at your partner praying it’s not your bloody turn while your partner is nudging you get up baby needs her nappy changed,baby needs a bottle , baby needs Peppa Pig. Bloody Peppa Pig daddy needs Bloody sleep.
So as I navigate getting out of bed without falling over the obstacle course of baby toys and equipment made all the more difficult as my eyes have not adjusted to the light or by being rudely awaking . I have one thought coffee.
Baby has another thought I pick her up and pray her nappy is wet and not soiled the last thing I need is to try to change a 10 month old when my brain and body is functioning at less than 50%.
Into the living room I go get baby on the changing mat dash to the TV get it on get Netflix on and that bloody pig.
This might calm Thea enough for to get through changing her
Netflix and chill is hardly the term I would use for “5am Parents Club” Netflix is an essential survival tool. Once Netflix is on this gives you a window . This window is vital for getting through the hour. Once Peppa is on get the coffee on this energy boast is vital as you prepare babies breakfast and keep them entertained as Netflix will only work so long.
As I said entertainment is vital otherwise you get a noisy angry gremlin sorry baby if you have the energy go wild use your imagination be creative do some messy play or even art work very funny i here you say.
If not read a story and try not to fall asleep or maybe get on the ground and ruin your back more than it already is by playing with toys or just try to survive until daylight hits, your partner wakes or until your little one falls back to sleep.
If this sounds familiar you may want to join the club. But there are some side affects:
It can age you
You lose sense of time
You can injure yourself as your working under a lack of sleep
Headaches the noise the constant noise
Sometimes it feels like your in war and it’s only 6.30 am.
But I can offer you benefits :
Great chat with fellow parents going through this war.
Knowing you are not alone and you don’t have a devil child that wakes you at 5am every morning
Self satisfaction of getting through this time unscathed
You are bonding with your child and making memories
Some days you will be a superstar and get loads off your to do list well maybe
You are gaining an extra 2 hrs of the day you would never of had
Its free follow therealworkingdad share the #5amparents club and help each other through this time